Emotional Debt: Red in the Ledger of Your Heart

Girl in pain crying

Damaged Relationships

Throughout our lives, we walk in and out of many relationships. Some relationships only last for a season. Others last a lifetime. With all of these relationships, we are capable of hurting the people that we care about. If left unresolved, the pain that we cause can create an emotional debt in our lives. Anyone that has worked through any type of addiction program knows that one of the most important steps of these programs is making amends to people you have hurt. I believe this is something that we all need to do in our lives to eliminate the emotional debt.

Accumulating Emotional Debt

We accumulate emotional debt when our actions or inaction causes emotional pain to someone else. This could be to a parent, a child, a spouse, a friend, a co-worker, or basically anyone else that comes into our lives. The pain can be purely emotional, but it can also be physical, mental, or financial. The first step for wiping out that debt is the hardest, and that is asking for forgiveness.

Words are like toothpaste

Always remember, words are like toothpaste. Just like you can never get toothpaste back in the tube, you can never take back careless words.

Emotional Debt Forgiveness

It may feel like it is impossible to ask forgiveness from someone who we owe an emotional debt. The most important thing to remember is sincerity. As long as an apology comes from your heart, it will help you to heal. Even if the apology is rejected, at least you have tried to heal the wounds. Often, taking the first step to rectify your wrongs can do more to make you whole than forgiveness will.

Tearing Down The Mountain

Ain’t no mountain high enough, ain’t no valley low enough…

Over time, emotional debt can become a mountain to overcome. That mountain only gets higher if the pain inflicted is from family members and others that we have lifetime relationships with. Repentance can start to move the mountain, but we still need to do everything possible to make up for the mistakes of the past. Sometimes, an apology is the only thing that we can give. Sometimes, it takes a greater restitution to resolve relationship issues. It can be anything from giving time to someone you have hurt to monetary restitution if there was a financial impact. The only way to wipe the debt clean is to do everything you can to make up for hurting someone.

As difficult as it seems at times, we should always try to correct the wrongs we have committed in our lives. By taking care of our emotional debt, we not only can help to heal someone else’s wounds, but our own wounds as well.

Wayne Cochran

Database Administrator, writer, social media evangelist, and occasional traveler, Wayne writes whatever comes into his head or touches his heart. His interests vary from IT to matters of the heart to the dream of a future beach life.

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2 Responses

  1. Excellent blog post! Very thoughtful and inspiring. Thank you for posting this!

    • Thank you very much for your comments. I hope to inspire anyone that comes here and to get their minds working and maybe open their hearts to a little light if that is what they need.

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