Physical Intimacy: More Than Sexual Chemistry
One of the most basic and primal desires in our relationships is physical contact. Almost immediately, everyone thinks of sexual intimacy. But the physical intimacy that I am talking about is less than that, and yet much deeper than sex all at the same time.
Physical Intimacy Is Not Always Sexual
The first thing that we need to recognize is that just because contact is physical doesn’t mean it is sexual. A lot of our deep personal relationships have some sort of physical element. No one would say that the physical affection shown in a normal parent/child relationship is sexual. A mother soothes her child by holding them and comforting them when they are upset or scared.
In a romantic relationship, there is sexual intimacy and there is non-sexual physical intimacy. I believe that most people need both of these to truly feel fulfilled in the relationship. In many relationships, fulfilling one or both of these can be challenging. We all have different needs and desires, and these differences can cause issues when one partner feels they are missing a key element of their relationship.
Physical intimacy can take the form of many different gestures. It could be something as small as touching someone’s hand or putting your hand on their shoulder. Hugging, holding, and spooning provide opportunities for more intimate physical contact. All of these physical activities can strengthen the bond of a relationship. There are even scientifically proven benefits to cuddling.
Fulfilling the Need
There are times where you don’t get that physical intimacy that you desire. It could be that you aren’t in a relationship, or that your partner in your relationship does not have the same wants or needs when it comes to physical contact. One important thing to realize is that there is no shame in self-love. Even though it is nowhere near being the same as human contact, you may need to find some form of physical self comfort. It could be a cuddle with a pet, wrapping yourself around a body pillow, or wrapping yourself up in a blanket. Sometimes, you just have to find a way to fulfill the need for contact.
Sometimes a Cuddle is Just a Cuddle
There are times in most romantic relationships when a cuddle leads to something sexual. But there are times when the desire for a cuddle is simply a desire for comfort and affection. Whether it is after a hard day at work or just for no real reason at all, physical intimacy can make all of the difference in the world for your mood and your well-being.
Teaser: Next time we’ll talk about how music and our emotions interact.