Grieving the Loss of a Loved One

Our Shared Life Experiences

There are experiences that we all share as humans. Some of these are joyous, like marriage or the birth of a child. However there are also sorrowful life events that we all most go through. The one that causes the greatest amount of grieving in all of our lives is the death of a loved one.

The Pain of Losing a Loved One

It is painful dealing with the grief of losing someone who you love. I have had loved ones that I have had to watch suffer through a long, agonizing end. Agonizing for them because of the constant pain as they cling to this world, and agonizing for their loved ones, watching them suffer as they slowly fade away.

I’ve also lost loved ones suddenly, without warning. Instead of gradually accepting the loss, losing someone suddenly feels like your heart has been mercilessly ripped from your chest.

No matter how our loved ones pass from this world, we lose a piece of our own souls with theirs because of how much of our lives we pour into each other.

Then Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned for his son many days. All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. “No,” he said, “I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.” So his father wept for him.
— Genesis 37:34-35 (NIV)

The Greatest Suffering

The greatest suffering in our lives is losing someone who we love. The pain of losing someone who you love shakes you to your very core. However it is a part of life that we all must face.

By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your food
until you return to the ground,
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return.”
— Genesis 3:19 (NIV)

Even though death is an unavoidable part of life, that doesn’t take away any of the pain that losing a loved one causes. We build our lives through our relationships. We are not solitary creatures. When someone who we have a relationship with dies, it creates a void in our hearts that no one can fill.

Working Through Grieving

We all respond to the pain of losing a loved one differently. You may experience great sorrow, anger, and even physical pain. Sometimes the suffering can feel unbearable. The pain of losing a loved one can cause inconsolable grief. However sometimes we don’t need consolation. It is best to let out all of the emotion and release everything that you feel. We need to process what we feel, because that is the only way that we can move forward.

Healing and Rebuilding

After grieving the loss of a loved one, the hardest part is going forward with your life afterward. As Christians, our faith gives us the confidence that we will see our loved ones again.

‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.
— Revelation 21:4 (NIV)

Even before we reunite with our loved ones in Heaven, we can take comfort in that even though our they are gone, they will forever live on in our memories and in our hearts.

He’s not really dead. As long as we remember him.
— Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Even though the loss of a loved one creates a void in our lives and in our hearts, over time we can heal. We aren’t meant to forget the people that we’ve loved that have passed from this world. We need to share the love we had with them with others.