Relationship’s Purpose: Reason, Season, or Lifetime

A Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime

Throughout our lives, we will have many relationships, whether they are romantic, friendships, or familial relationships. Some of these are only for a short time, while others can last a lifetime. Sometimes, we may need to consider a relationship’s purpose. Was it part of our lives for a reason, for a season, or for a lifetime? Having three serious romantic relationships as a young adult, I feel that each of them fell into one of these purposes.

Relationship for a Reason

A relationship can come into being for a reason. Sometimes that reason may be abundantly clear from day one. In other relationships, it may not be evident what the reason was until long after it is over. With my first relationship, there was always a surface issue that was my reason for being there, but in hindsight there were also much deeper reasons. Whether it was her parent’s divorce when we first met, reconnecting years later after her own first divorce, or her having to face the demons from her past when payment came due for what she had been a victim of in her youth, there were always these surface issues that were my evident reason for being in her life. Ultimately, I feel that I was in her life during those times to help guide her toward the person that she needed to become.

Relationship for a Season

Sometimes, a relationship is only meant to last for a season. The relationship might be to teach us something important about life. It might just be to prepare us for the next stage of life. This was my second serious relationship. For me, it was a lot more carefree than anything I’d ever experienced. It was a long distance relationship, and even though we cared for each other, with the distance and the different places in life that we were in, it was never meant to last. It did help me see what a healthy relationship could potentially look like.

Reason and Season: Two Sides of the Same Coin?

With my first two examples, you may notice something. In my relationship for a reason, I was helping someone else grow. Meanwhile, my relationship for a season helped me to grow. Both of these are short-term relationships, and I see them as two sides of the same coin. Oftentimes, there is a specific reason that one person is in another’s life for a season. The role can be transitive, and it in fact should be in the most meaningful relationship.

The Lifetime Relationship

In the lifetime relationship, both partners are there to help each other grow. While a relationship for a reason or season can often be one-sided when it comes to personal growth for each person, both partners are there when the other needs them in a lifetime relationship. This is my relationship with my wife. We’ve made a commitment to always be by each other’s side. Even just during our marriage, there have been times that we have faced together that I am not sure if either of us could have stood alone. We’ve had difficult times, like when I lost my job or when a tree fell and hit our house during a tornado. There have been good times, like the trip with her extended family to Disney World. We’ve dealt with sad times, like the passing of my grandfather and her grandmother within a year of each other. And we’ve had happy times, like the holidays, weddings, and family gatherings.

What is Your Relationship’s Purpose?

The lifetime relationship truly transitions from reason to reason and season to season as two people grow and help each other grow together. Think about what your relationship’s purpose is. Is it for a reason, a season, or a lifetime?

Teaser: Next time we’ll be evaluating when multiple signs lead to the same conclusion.